Self-esteem is one of the five key areas of MindWork (link to 5 key areas) and plays a major role in whether or not you’ll succeed at losing weight, sticking to a diet or exercise routine, or just maintaining a healthy lifestyle.
What is self-esteem
You probably already have a good idea of what self-esteem is…
It’s how highly you think of yourself and how much you believe in yourself.
Trust me when I say:
Self-esteem is one of the important parts of achieving your goals.
You see, self-esteem directly affects your motivation, confidence and determination.
It doesn’t matter how hard you try, you won’t succeed if you don’t believe in yourself.
And you can’t believe in yourself without healthy self-esteem.
With good self-esteem, you’ll know that your goals are achievable, all you need to do is stick at it – and if you can do that, it’s only a matter of time before you succeed.
If you have low-self esteem, you’ll doubt yourself. You won’t believe you can change.
And like a self-fulfilling prophecy, you don’t even make an effort.
It might surprise you to learn that this self-esteem is all in your mind. Not that it makes your feelings of inadequacy any less real.
But your mind is actually using your low-self esteem to give up. Because if it doesn’t, it has to face the unknown. The person you could be if you reach your goals.
You see, your mind likes predictability. It feels safe when it knows what is happening next. This is wired into your biology. I cover this concept in more detail here.
Now you and I know that you would be a happier, better person if you achieve your goals. But your mind doesn’t. Change scares it.
So what does your mind do?
It fills your head up with self-doubt. It sets the stage for disappointment before you have even started.
Then, when you do give up on that healthy diet, your mind says:
“See, I told you this would happen, why did you bother?”
And that’s the exact trap your mind wants you to fall into…
A self defeating cycle that you just can’t escape from.
Think back to the last time you prepared to lose weight. Did the thought process go something like this?
- 1. I can’t lose weight, I’ll be this size forever.
- 2. Okay, I’ve started my diet, but I’m probably going to fail.
- 3. I’m not motivated to keep going, I’m giving up
- 4. I failed, see, I knew I couldn’t do this
This is your mind using your self-esteem against you. It wants you to fail. It might seem weird that your mind doesn’t want you to be happy, but it’s true…
Your mind likes you being in this unhappy place. It’s comfortable and familiar. And it feels safe.
You cannot stick to a diet, keep an exercise routine, lose weight or lead a healthy lifestyle while your self-esteem is working against you.
The Self-Esteem Scale
Low self esteem – good self esteem – egotistical
Think of your self esteem as being on a scale…
On the one end of the scale you have:
Low self esteem
You don’t believe in yourself or your ability to reach your goals. Negative thoughts and emotions cause you to imagine rejection where there is none. Due to a lack of self-confidence, believing in yourself scares you.
Despite being on a diet, you eat pizza with your friends because you worry that they’ll think less of you if you don’t join in – you don’t have the confidence to speak up and order something else.
And on the other end of the scale you have:
You think you are perfect. You are so sure of yourself, that you can’t fail. You can’t identify your weaknesses, and avoid any situations where your failure will be on display. When you do fail, you make excuses that it was never your fault.
Example: You have told countless people how amazing you will look after this diet, and how you’ll have no problem achieving it. You’ve talked up this image of success so much, that the goals become unrealistic – you couldn’t reach them if you tried. Being unable to succeed, you give up before you’ve even started.
In order for you to achieve your healthy lifestyle, you want to balance this scale. The more balanced your self-esteem is, the more likely it is that you will succeed.
But as the scale tips one way or the other, your mind will use your self-esteem as an excuse to throw in the towel – to get you to give up on your diet or exercise routine.
The closer you are to the middle of the scale, the more likely it is that you will succeed in your goals. And that’s exactly why you want to balance your self-esteem.
Unfortunately, you don’t get to choose where you sit on the self-esteem scale. Your mind has done this for you, using a whole variety of life experiences since you were born.
Your self-esteem becomes so deeply ingrained in your life that you might not even know these problems are there – much less how to overcome then
Your self-esteem is specific to you. It was shaped by your upbringing, your environment and your biology. No one else will have exactly the same self-esteem as you.
To put it simply, your self-esteem is unique to you. And to balance it, you need a unique solution – one that is tailored just for you.
That’s where MindWork comes in. MindWork focuses on identifying and balancing your self-esteem levels.
Through one-on-one support, advice and strategies, you can balance your self-esteem once and for all.
Never again will your self esteem:
- Stop you from giving up your diet
- Cause you to eat ice-cream instead of losing weight
- Choose hiding inside and watching netflix over exercise.
Are you ready to stop your self-esteem from getting in the way of your goals?